I’m sure she will: she is a focused person who sets goals for herself and makes them happen—reflecting both a honed self-discipline and a gift of the Holy Spirit. She’s also an introvert—a person who is energized more by being alone or with one other person rather than a group. Introverts have to work a bit harder, invest more energy, in order to develop new relationships than an extrovert who is charged up by meeting new people.
Investing our time and energy in new relationships is an essential part of our calling to follow Christ. In the early Church when Christians travelled, they sought lodging in the homes of other Christ-followers who they did not know. The host had to invest their time and energy in opening their lives to someone they did not know personally but knowing that they were saved and brought together by the same Lord. The guest had to trust their host would not exploit their vulnerability. (See 2 and 3 John, short letters in the Bible, for how this did and didn’t work!) Both parties had to invest in a new relationship.
Likewise, St. John’s has been blessed by new members over the last few years, even during the pandemic. However, many forces challenge developing relationships. Pandemic restrictions meant relationships drifted apart. We have three different services with different styles that inevitably creates three different communities. Long-time members are aging and not able to participate as they did in the past. Newer members are busy with work, family, and other responsibilities. The combination of these factors means that it’s impossible to know everybody and that developing new relationships takes intentional effort.
There are a couple of simple ways to invest in a new relationship. One is to plan on staying around 15 minutes after the service to talk to someone. Think of this as a part of our worship time! (Jesus saves us so we can love God and love our neighbor—investing time and energy in a new relationship is loving your neighbor!) Find out what someone else does for fun, where someone would like to visit, and see where the conversation goes. I suspect you’ll find something in common that will deepen your relationship! We’re working on space in the courtyard that will help encourage taking this time.
A second way is to get involved with some other activity outside of worship. The Education Hour on Sundays at 9:45 brings people from different services together, as does the Monday night 7pm online Bible Study and the Thursday morning 10am Bible Study. The Men’s breakfast is starting on Oct 8 at 8am; the Women’s Brunch also on Oct 8 at 10am. Family Promise (Sept 25-Oct 2), the Shower Ministry (Oct 25), property work days, and more are all opportunities to work alongside someone and develop relationships.
God richly blessed St. John’s through Vicar Cogan over the last year, in part, because he invested so much into relationships with so many. In more ways than I can describe here, he helped us accelerate our vision of deepening relationships and developing leaders. I think he leaves us better than he found us. I am personally grateful for the energy he put into our time together and I pray that we will find ways to keep connected as he and Katelyn begin new adventures in the familiar surroundings of Indiana.
We are on this journey of following Christ together. The Church continues to be one of the few places where people from different walks of life meet. Our society needs us to lead and be examples in developing relationships. The road of life is not easy, and God brings us together to support one another in a network of relationships that catch us when we fall and help us to keep going. Just like putting a little money in savings each week, it’s worth putting our time and energy investing in relationships.
Your neighbor in Christ, Pastor Peter
